Twin Flames, Extreme Pain and Faith

If you have recently found, or have been wrestling with, a Twin Flame relationship for any amount of time, I'm sure you've discovered the absolute debilitating, at times, pain. Though I believe the pain, to a degree, is necessary as it shapes us into who we are supposed to be, I also believe we make it far worse on ourselves than it has to be.

My personal twin flame journey has been about as complicated as most. I wish I'd known or understood the concept before I met this man who was a mirror of myself, but alas, not so much.

As I've said before, I wasn't aware of the concept before it started coming up in my meditation, but I will tell you, that the only thing that has enabled me to survive the pain of this experience, the only reason I have kept my TF in my life, is because of my personal faith.

Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not about to preach religion at you. However, without some kind of faith in something I honestly don't know how a person would survive this. I read it put once, "Why would staring at the other half of your soul and having it reject you, not be the most painful experience in the universe?"

I know there is a lot of suffering and pain going on in our world. I've had my fair share of it, but this is different. It's very hard to even explain it because it's so unlike anything else you've experienced. You think you are crazy. You think it shouldn't be like this. You think there is something wrong with you. My pain was compounded by thinking I'd lost my mind over some man, something I considered myself too smart and self aware to ever do. Yet there I was, letting a man constantly hurt me, reject me, push me aside and in general constantly say "I don't love you, I love her" ... and I was saying, ok, I'll just sit here, take it and wait.
heavy sigh...

For a very long time, I very seriously thought I had lost my mind.

I'm still not entirely certain I did not.

However, as I now sit on the other side
of at least the initial barrage of pain, emotions and events, I can tell you that if you handle the situation with awareness and a sense of surrender you will get through. I will tell you though, that my spiritual life was changed forever... in a good way. As I said at the top, without faith in a higher power that knew what the hell he/she was doing, I seriously don't think I would have made it through this, and certainly not with the new found inner strength, peace and wisdom that I gained for the pain I experienced.

That pain will do one of two things for you, destroy you, or change you into something you never knew you could be. In my personal opinion, faith and belief that there is purpose in that pain, is what will make the difference.

What you are, and/or, will experience, there is no comparison for it. The first thing you need to do is acknowledge that the pain is real, you are not being too emotional or ridiculous. You are suffering. The thing is, pain is inevitable, suffering is a choice and that is what you need to get a handle on. Pain is inflicted upon us, suffering is pain we won't release.

The only way through this, is to continuously be self aware of what is going on with you, how and why you are hurt and allowing something (for me it was god) to use the pain to sculpt you and then take the pain from you.

For me, I got myself straight with the essence I call god, and in meditation we agreed that this was indeed a path I was to walk. Believe me, that question was asked repeatedly for months

"Are you sure god? ...seriously? I have to STAY!?!?!"

I was not the most submissive soul on the planet during this. I fought the pain, the relationship, even the inevitable outcome which I'd see through visions of him and I together. In my situation there is another woman involved now, my tf loves her. Despite I was in his life first, despite she knows about me, I feel like the other woman and how on earth does one reconcile themselves to that?

If you have discovered twin flames, I'm assuming you have some sort of spiritual base or calling in your life. Now is the time to nurture that. Bring it to the surface, make it your focus... not the twin flame which will be the thing calling your focus. This path is spiritual in nature. It may walk along side a romantic path, but the point is your essence, your soul. That my dear friends, is spiritual.

I see so many women discovering what they believe to be a twin flame, but without any type of solid faith foundation, they are blown away by their powerful emotions. To be a spiritual being, one needs to have a foundation of faith. I was raised in the Baptist church and though I no longer cling to a church or religious format, Christianity is still the basis for my faith, that works for me. That god has never failed me. He's seen me through so much in my life and he got me through every single day of this torture I was in.

I'm not saying you need to find Christianity. I believe there is validity in all spiritual paths. I believe all truth is god's truth, but we all have different receptors. Some of us will hear him through Christianity, but it's just as valid to hear him through Paganism, Islam, Judaism, Buddhism... I could go on, but my point is not to try and "convert" you, but rather to encourage you to find a true rock to cling to during this. None of your friends will understand. If you went to a shrink, they'd start citing all the "rules" on healthy relationships. If you can find strength or support in a group of others seeking, or having found, their twin flames, that can be good. However, I find in most of those groups, it can be quite like the final scene of Titanic and everyone is screaming and shouting in fear looking for some kind of flotation device. If you get swept up in the panic, you will go under.

The only thing I found effective to not lose yourself to fear and panic, is prayer, meditation, and faith that there is purpose in this. Faith in a loving god who you know has your best interest at heart. If you build a relationship with god, and you learn to trust him, and he says stay put... I found it possible to stay put despite the internal screaming and running in circles looking for a flotation device!

There is nothing I can say to alleviate the pain of this journey. The pain is here to sculpt you. To polish and carve away the pieces of you that are not meant to be. It is here to strip your down bare so that all that remains is your pure essence, your beauty, not the scars life has dealt you. It is necessary. What I am trying to give you, is not a way out, but a tool that can help you navigate and get through it. Not everyone is going to make it. Not every twin flame reunites. Not everyone can endure. Not everyone can stand strong in the faith needed to see this journey to it's end.

Is it worth all the pain? I have to believe it is. Am I reunited with my tf? No, not yet, but I feel the time is drawing near and I don't think it would be had I not clung to god and let him lead me through the maze of fear and pain.

I believe with all that I am, the pain journey has a built in timer. You control it by how you respond to it

I believe with all that I am, that most of us will get lost in that maze and cause ourselves far greater pain than is ever necessary.

You are staring down a path of darkness, flame that looks like it could destroy you, every scary monster from your entire life that has ever threatened you, and things hidden at the way back of the closet you have no idea even to expect... do you really want to go down that path alone, with no guide?

I know religion has been a wounding experience for many of us, I'm not advocating "go to church" I am saying, find your god. Find that higher power that calls to you and give yourself to it. Let that presence guide, guard and protect you through this and you will come out the other side changed, not destroyed. I promise you that.

Again, twin flames is a spiritual path. The only way to survive it, is to be a spiritual being, that requires the development of faith. On the other side, that faith will not desert you and it will be the rock and comfort you need inside you constantly for the rest of this life. The journey is painful, yes, but like a moth to a flame, most won't resist the call, no matter how dire the path looks. So whether you are up to your eyeballs in it now, or you simply feel the sense of that other piece of you out there somewhere, please, take the time to cultivate a strong spirituality. It is well worth the time. It will never fail you.

I am currently working on a small e-book of twin flame survival tips based on my own experiences. It will be available on Amazon sometime this month and I will let you all know more details soon.

I truly do understand how hard this is.

I truly do understand how much you may want to turn back at times.

But do you really want to live the rest of your life wondering what would have happened if you'd simply seen it through?

I find myself in that place a lot right now and as scared as I honestly am about the coming months, I will stay put. I will not throw out all the pain and all I've gone through and never know what the end could have been.

I'll keep you all in the loop as much as possible, respecting the privacy of all involved of course. In the meantime, now that I pray constantly for my sisters in tf pain and I send my energy and strength as much as I am able.

Take care, stay strong, and develop a legendary faith... with those things, you can change the world.